In case you didn’t know,
Your body is already in perfect condition.
Many of us are looking to make changes in our bodies, either through fat loss, muscle gain, or cosmetic surgery. For the majority of us, these changes stem from a belief system built on not feeling good enough. We attempt to make changes from a mindset of, “I’ll be good enough when I lose this weight/have this procedure done.” The “not good enough” narrative is rampant in our society, and it shows up in statements like, “I’m not small enough. My booty isn’t big enough. My breasts are not lifted high enough. My stomach is not flat enough.” The underlying belief is, “I AM NOT ENOUGH.”
Now imagine trying to accomplish anything in life with this mindset: how successful do you expect to be at any of your goals if deep down inside, you believe you aren’t “enough” to begin with? Can you really excel in school if you don’t feel smart enough? That belief is not in alignment with your goals. If you’re insecure about your ability to do well, the likelihood that you’ll do well is very small. Well, the same applies to body transformation. This idea that you aren’t good enough does NOT, I repeat, DOES NOT GO AWAY once you have reached your goals, because the root cause of not feeling good enough runs much deeper than you can imagine.
Many of us are taught to believe that change can only be inspired by situations you aren’t happy with. But I’m here to tell you that there’s ANOTHER source of inspiration you can tap into. Instead of focusing on what you “don’t want,” start focusing on what you DO want. And focus on it from a place of love and acceptance for who you are right now, in this moment.
For many of you, acceptance is difficult because that “not good enough” script replaying over and over in your head began very early. My challenge to you is to take out a pen and paper (or a journal), and do the following exercise to start the process of healing:
- Ask yourself, “When did I first start to see myself as not good enough? What was the experience or comment that triggered that belief about myself?” Write it down.
- Now ask yourself, “If I could build a time machine and catch myself in that exact moment when I began to feel like I wasn’t good enough, what would I say to my younger self? What words would I use to encourage myself as a child?” Write that down.
- Now look at the words of encouragement you used to encourage your child-self. How did it make you feel to stand up for yourself in such a loving way? In the same way you stood up for your inner child, you can stand up against those old beliefs and for yourself NOW. Repeat those encouraging words to yourself over and over again. Say them in front of a mirror.